I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
