i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Randomize
