I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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