i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
