i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
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