Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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