I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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