My nipple is on Facebook.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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