Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
