Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
