I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
