She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
