I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
