fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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