CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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