the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize