Whod you bang
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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