i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize