they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
