On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
