can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
