she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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