let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
