when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
