Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
