I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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