You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Randomize