Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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