yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Randomize
