Will you blow on my dice?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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