let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
