But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
