when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
