Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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