It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
