Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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