I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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