Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so let's talk penis.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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