Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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