Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize