That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
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