It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
