Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
ok first of all what the fuck
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize