Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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