Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
