i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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