try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
