I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
