u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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