his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
