"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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