How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
