so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
